Where Did Our Beloved America Go?

A Democracy forged in the fire of human discontent

and molded into an enduring symbol of freedom.

A Republic founded on the highest of human ideals

to aggressively defend against tyranny and oppression

that may come from within our borders and far beyond.

A country of immigrants from every corner of the world

who always held true to the promise for others that came.

A land of hope cradled between two shinning seas

where anything no matter how improvable was possible,

where dreams that seemed impossible could be realized.

A nation full of people who are stronger and better

only when they elect to embrace their great diversity,

and not only celebrate their differences, but relish in them.

The home of a grand lady with a torch standing in a busy harbor,

a bold monument to the virtues and principles of freedom itself,

a profound testament to what our great country proudly stands for,

a welcoming sight for those desperately seeking a flicker of hope,

for those yearning to be free from persecution and oppression,

for those seeking a new beginning in a more accepting place.

 

Please! Please! tell me where did our beloved America go?

How did we go from tearing down walls in other nations

to erecting these unwelcoming monuments in our own backyard?

How did we go from being the leader of the free world

to putting people from neighboring countries in metal cages?

How did we go from being the world’s defender of democracy

to separating small children from their families at our borders?

How did we lose our civility and our national sense of purpose

to become repugnant provocateurs of ignorance and intolerance?

Today one small child cries for their mother on our border.

Tomorrow we mourn in silence for a great nation,

that once was the focal point of democracy in the world,

that once set the example for other nations to follow,

that once stood as the standard-bearer for freedom everywhere.

Please! Please! tell me will our beloved America ever return?

For The Students Standing Up Against Gun Violence In Their Schools

To all the students that are walking out to take a stand on and seek action on gun violence, I would like to say that every American in this country should be proud of you. Your voices are those that should and must be heard on this issue. You are the ones that must attend our schools and you have an absolute right to be safe in them, no matter what must to be done to achieve it. Do not allow anyone to deny your voice, do not allow anyone to dissuade you from lending your voice to not just the cause of your lifetime, but the greatest good of your lives. Your voices, your tears, and your anger over the senseless death and human carnage these school shootings have caused across this country must be heard, so do not be afraid to shout from every city, town, and village in this country “this must stop now.” Your voices hold the promise that students coming behind you will not have to hide in terror while gun shots ring out in their school, watch as the bodies of friends and teachers are carried from their school with tears of abject terror and sorrow running down their cheeks. Your voices hold the promise that not one more parent will have to stand over the coffin of a child contemplating the life that could have been had it not been for a gunman with too few screws, too many bullets, and the means to turn a school into a war zone. Your voices hold the promise to give voice to all the young people that have been silenced by gun violence in our schools. Your voices hold the promise of a tomorrow when the halls of our nation’s schools will once again hold only memories of the hopes and dreams of those who pass through them, not the memories of bodies, blood, and tears that fell on them or the screams of terror and rapid gunfire that echoed through them one day shattering the lives of many in an instant and forever engraving a horrific memory in the minds of those who survived. You hold the promise of a better tomorrow, so young people be loud, be proud, and make your voices heard every damn chance you get.

Written by Kim Morrison

Does The Kiln Of Life Not Alter What The Potter’s Hands Creates?

This interpretation research paper was done for my religion course at Saint Leo University for which I got a 97%. It is all based on just a couple of scriptures from the bible and my research on them. This course on salvation has been one of the most provocative and thought provoking college courses I have ever taken and it has pushed my skills as a writer and thinker like no other. I do not expect everyone to agree with what I wrote here, but I think many might find it interesting.

 

 

 

Does The Kiln of Life Not Alter What The Potter’s Hands Creates?

Kim E Morrison

Saint Leo University

 

 

 

 

 

Does The Kiln Of Life Not Alter What The Potter’s Hands Creates?

 

Did you ever wish that you could have conversation with God? I am quite sure many of us do and I am certain God knows that I do. I hope he also knows that I do not wish to have his audience anytime soon because, after all, this blissful ignorance to our creator’s ways that we all share should have some tangible virtue. If any conversation with God were to take place, I am certain that many of our questions would relate to the bible and these two verses would most certainly be on my list, not because I think they are more important than any others in the Bible, but because God’s response sounds angry: Rom. 9:20-21-20 “On the contrary, who are you, O man, who answers back to God? The thing molded will not say to the molder, Why did you make me like this,” will it? 21 Or does not the potter have a right over the clay, to make from the same lump one vessel [a]for honorable use and another [b]for common use?” My first question to God about these verses would be, why does man attempting to use one of the gifts, though limited they are, you endowed humanity with make you angry?  Should our father in heaven not be proud that we mere humans are attempting to go beyond our natural limits to try an understand only that which you hold the answer too? If these two questions I posed to God, did not get my butt tossed on the elevator to Hell immediately, I would then be forced to point out that if we were made in your image then the clay the potter made us out of is quite unique because it can change over time. For the new piece of pottery God’s hands created would not be the same piece after a lifetime of use. Which goes to my title question, Does the kiln of life not alter what the potter’s hands create?

 

 

These two verses along with many others from the bible have been wrestled with by many scholars, theologians, and saints through the ages. One the most notable Saint Augustine of Hippo discussed his views thoughts on it several times in different pieces of his written work. In his “Rebuke and Grace” Saint Augustine states that he can not answer why “God gave them, humans, the love by which they lived as Christians did not give them perseverance” (Augustine, Rotelle, & Teske, 2001, p. 119).  Saint Augustine then states that in saying that he does not know he is not being arrogant, but is recognizing his limits (Augustine, Rotelle, & Teske, 2001, p. 119). Later when free choice of human is mentioned or brought up, he states that is not in accord with the grace of God, but in opposition to it. Whether someone perseveres in good is not because God granted it, but because the will of humans brought it about (Augustine, Rotelle, & Teske, 2001, p. 119).

My human mind may well be limited as many of the Saints suggest and incapable of understanding God’s inscrutable judgements, but it is good enough to see Saint Augustine’s grossly flawed logic. Previously he states that God gave humankind love, but did not give them perseverance and later he states that if we persevere in good it is not because God granted it, but because the will of humans was able to bring it about.  First, if someone has the will to do something, they are determined. If they have persevered in doing something, it was because they were determined. Determined in some form is a synonym for both the word persevere and will, so you cannot have one and not the other. Second, If I, a member of humankind, has the capability or will to achieve goodness after I have sinned, why then do I not have the will to avoid sin in the first place?

In his work “The Predestination of the Saints” Saint Augustine tells us that faith from the beginning to completion is a gift from God (Augustine, Rotelle, & Teske, 2001, p. 163). He then states that the gift of faith is given to some, but not to others and that the fact that it is not given to all should not disturb any believer who believes that because of original sin that “all have entered into condemnation” (Augustine, Rotelle, & Teske, 2001, p. 163). Saint Augustine thinks this is just because no one could blame God if no one were set free because our condemnation was built in at birth. In other words, those who are saved have reason to thank God for his mercy, but those who are not saved have no reason to complain because we were already condemned at birth because Adam sinned. Saint Augustine believed God’s anger toward us was just and that his mercy to a few is great, in his thinking, salvation illustrates God’s mercy and damnation shows God’s justice, so God’s judgements are inscrutable and we should not be questioning them (Augustine, Rotelle, & Teske, 2001, p. 163).

First, the reason some humans would think they have reason to complain here is not because of themselves, but because we are talking about condemning a being at birth. In the limited human mind, we are hearing that our father in heaven is condemning what we perceive as innocence. A human being would be even less tolerant of the notion if they knew Saint Augustine created or advanced this idea of original sin. Two, if a human knows that he or she is already condemned to damnation at the start because of Adam’s sin, would he not be more compelled to commit sin than to refrain from it. In other words, if you call humankind reprobate from the beginning because you believe human society cannot be perfected, have you not set into motion a self-fulfilling prophecy for all of humanity? Would that not make God’s mercy to some seem even more merciful and his judgement of damnation to the rest of us seem less egregious?

 

In “Calvin’s Institutes” John Calvin tells us that all the sons of Adam, humankind, because of original sin fell into a state of wretchedness. Calvin then goes on to talk about the power of God is such that it cannot be hindered. Calvin does pose a powerful question by saying, “How could he who is the judge of the world commit any unrighteousness?” (Humpries, n.d., p. 321). Using (Prov.26:10) “The great God that formed all things both rewardeth the fool and rewardeth transgressors.”  Calvin suggests it is God’s pleasure “to inflict punishment on fools and transgressors though he is not pleased to bestow his spirit on them.” Calvin goes on to state that humankind suffers from a “monstrous infatuation” because we seek to subject something to our limited reasoning that is beyond his ability to understand. What God knows and only God knows is what Calvin refers to as the “secret counsel” of God (Humpries, n.d., p. 322).

Calvin does appear to see original sin a lot like Saint Augustine does. Calvin tells us in no uncertain terms that what God does is part of his “secret counsel” and that his power cannot be hindered and that what God does is not within bounds of our limited human reasoning. In answer to his question I do not believe that God is capable of unrighteousness. What I do believe is all men past or present are capable of misinterpreting God’s word to suit their beliefs. After all God’s word had to go through man to arrive in a book man refers to as the revealed word, so man is not questioning God, but rather other men’s interpretations of God’s words.

A far less known writer named Dave Bovenmyer has an interesting interpretation of   Romans. 9:20. He tells us that we should be “careful not to think that the analogy fits reality in every single detail” (Bovenmyer, n.d.). He explains that Paul is not telling us that we are senseless mounds of clay without the ability to reason or resist God’s will, nor is Paul saying that God creates some people to make them evil (Bovenmyer, n.d.). He also states that Paul is not saying that God turns some men toward evil because of some secret plan that is opposite of his revealed will. What Paul is doing is using an analogy “in relation to God’s freedom to show mercy-to have mercy on one (like Moses) and harden on another (like Pharaoh)” (Bovenmyer, n.d.). It does seem like the next two verses reinforce his evaluation because they talk of “vessels of wrath prepared for destruction, in order to make known the riches of his glory for vessels of mercy, which he prepared beforehand for glory” (Bovenmyer, n.d.).

While Bovenmyer’s interpretation of these verses might sound simplistic to some, they certainly raise less questions and less push back from readers than the interpretations of Saint Augustine and Calvin. The idea that it may be in relation to mercy is made more sensible when he uses the examples of Moses and Pharaoh because they are severely opposite poles, like good and evil.

The issue I have with Saint Augustine’s and Calvin’s interpretations is that they are intertwined with their belief in the original sin. The idea that each of us is damaged by the sin of our original physical father Adam and because of it we are all doomed to suffer the same fate from birth which is eternal damnation and we cannot be saved unless our course is altered in some way by divine intervention or by God’s grace. We cannot help but commit sin because it is in our nature to sin and we have no power over if we sin because as stated earlier we lack the will, so we are all condemned to fail.  As a result, we are all reprobate in the beginning because of Adam’s sin, so our lives, no matter how pure we lead them, are ill fated journeys toward destruction unless our merciful God judges us fit for heaven and elects to save us. If not, we stay reprobate and are doomed to our predestined fate. The trouble with this is that Saint Augustine set up the idea of the original sin which in turn gave birth to a gnostic thinking that states that man is forced to sin by his nature. The early Church believed man could choose between his nature because of his fee will. Another problem with this view is that all which is connected to man is built around the concept of fate. A concept that judging by “The Banquet of The Ten Virgins” Discourse 8, Chapter 16 that bothered some of the early Church fathers to the point that they questioned it with the following: “Now those who decide that man is not possessed of free-will, and affirm that he is governed by the unavoidable necessities of fate, and her unwritten commands, are guilty of impiety towards God Himself, making Him out to be the cause and author of human evils. For if He harmoniously orders the whole circular motion of the stars, with a wisdom which man can neither express nor comprehend, directing the course of the universe; and the stars produce the qualities of virtue and vice in human life, dragging men to these things by the chains of necessity; then they declare God to be the Cause and Giver of evils. But God is the cause of injury to no one; therefore fate is not the cause of all things” (“CHURCH FATHERS: Banquet of the Ten Virgins, Discourse 8 (Methodius),” 1886).

Certainly no one now would want to imagine that God could be the cause and giver of evils or be the cause of injury to anyone because we correlate this kind of handy work with Satan, but a change of thought in those of that time who put fate in the forefront of theological discussion could have set the stage for the cruel and superstitious age history has shown us. Those periods of time where Catholics called people heretics and burned people at the stake for not believing exactly as they did and not subscribing to the thought in concert with their belief that the state had to be submissive to the Church. The Catholic Church wanted this because they believe in their tradition and that the Catholic Church is the repository for all of God’s grace. Anyone that didn’t go along with their entire program could be persecuted even when many of their basic beliefs coincided with Catholic thought of the time.

Given the religious wars in Europe and the history of persecution and violence associated with religious belief is it any wonder why the founding fathers of this country, who were of European heritage, went to great lengths to insure state sovereignty by installing the concept of separation of church and state right in the Constitution our nation was built on. Our founding fathers did not want the same thing that went on in Europe to continue here in the new world.  One could argue that religions violent history only serves to prove that humankind is automatically bent toward sin, but you cannot blame humankind for submitting to a built-in weakness when you have others putting the rules so far in opposition to each other that what one calls a righteousness action would be called sinful action by another. In other words, you cannot say burning someone at the stake for their beliefs is a righteous action when the God you claim you serve clearly states in his Commandments that “thou shall not kill.”  There is no quid pro quo, no grey area, and no exceptions in this language. Another thing telling humankind that they are all set for eternal damnation, regardless of how moral they live their life, because in God’s inscrutable judgement we deserve it because of Adam’s sin, the purveyors of this belief are canonizing a self fulfilling human prophecy that was created by religious figures long ago. One could call me a heretic for thinking this way, but I am sure many have considered this in one way or another and judging from pop culture it too has created our view of Satan. For example, in the film “Devils Advocate” you have Al Pacino, the Devil in this film, saying the following. “I do not make things happen. Free will, like a butterfly wings once touched they never get off the ground” (Lemkin & Gilroy, 1996).  Just perhaps, as suggested in this film, Satan does not have to make things happen, not just because of the evil that may dwell within our nature, but because men with good Godly intentions and strong beliefs set those wheels in motion a long time ago.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

References

 

Augustine, Rotelle, J. E., & Teske, R. J. (2001). The Works of Saint Augustine (2nd Release). Electronic edition. Answer to the Pelagians, IV: To the Monks of Hadrumetum and Provence: Volume I/26. Charlottesville, VA: InteLex Corporation.

 

Humpries, T. L. (Trans.). (n.d.). Many are called, but who is chosen. Winona, MN: Professors choice.

 

CHURCH FATHERS: Banquet of the Ten Virgins, Discourse 8 (Methodius). (1886). Retrieved from http://www.newadvent.org/fathers/062308.htm

 

Bovenmyer, D. (n.d.). Romans 9 and Unconditional Election | Dave Bovenmyer’s Writings. Retrieved from https://davebovenmyer.com/2013/06/23/observations-on-romans-9/

 

Lemkin, J., & Gilroy, T. (1996, January 18). Devil’s Advocate Script at IMSDb. Retrieved from http://nldslab.soe.ucsc.edu/charactercreator/film_corpus/film_2012xxxx/imsdb.com/Devil’s-Advocate.html

 

 

Someone Up There has Got To Love Us

I wrote this piece for a thought provoking college class I am currently taking on Faith and Salvation online at Saint Leo University. I do not know yet what grade I will get on it, but I figured it was worth sharing with my readers up here.

 

Will man be saved by God? Who will be saved by God? Is one of the Catholic faith more likely to be saved by God than a Lutheran, a Presbyterian, or someone from another faith? Can a simple man who believes in God and occasionally reads the revealed word, but elects not to be connected to any church be saved by God? Would God even bother to try to save a true atheist or a non-believer in God and Heaven? Is there a way for a man to receive the grace of God and be saved and welcomed into God’s Kingdom on his own? I think any man, even those in Godly robes with full knowledge of the revealed word, that thinks he can answer these questions unequivocally to an absolute certainty is exhibiting a level of human audacity, so grand in dimension and size that even God himself is stunned by it. I have no absolute proof, just as no one else does about salvation, but I believe every time our human minds entertain questions which are purely in the hands of the divine one, God is sitting on his throne in heaven with his hand on his forehead going oy vey these wondrous creatures that I have created in my own image cannot even understand what is in their own hearts and minds, yet they presume to know what is in their creators heart and mind based only on those I spoke to or through centuries ago. However, I do believe despite it all that God loves us though and like a mother of many children, God is most protective of the creation, no matter how imperfect or screwed up, that is most like him. I do not believe “man set himself against God and sought to attain his goal apart from God,” because I do not believe there was a deliberate conscious effort on the part of humans to go against the creator. Any appearance that we set ourselves against God must be considered either a thoughtless action on our part or at the very worst an act of hubris in ourselves without regard to God. Pride or hubris is one of the seven deadly sins, but it is one of the sneakier sins because we often do not know it has a hold of us until it is too late. God knows all too well about man’s inclination toward sin because we have failed, starting with Adam, every test he has thrown in front of us, but God also has the wisdom to know that our inclination to sin is equaled with our inclination to do great good.

If we are truly all God’s children and he is our father in heaven as we have often been taught, he must forgive us of our sins for it is not within in a true father to stop loving, to stop caring, to stop being father. It is a job that never ends and with that job comes a lot of worry, pain, and sacrifice and the best any father can hope for, be he God or human, are a few fleeting moments of joy and pride in the being or beings born from the seed he planted.  I do not care whether you are Catholic, Baptist, or whatever, or you never go to church, or what nonsense you believe in, or think you know.  If he is a true father, “our father who thou art in heaven” will not forsake us because it is not in the nature or soul of a true father to do so. Our father will try to illuminate the path to heaven for us all, he will try to save us all if he can, and he will try keep us all from falling into the clutches of Satan’s grip because a true father will protect and defend his children to the end. Unfortunately, just because our father has the will and desire to try and save us all does not mean he will be able to do so. The desire and will to do something even if heaven sent does guarantee thy will be done or achieved. A baby growing in the womb of a mother is not guaranteed life in this world, so how could we expect our father in heaven, no matter how great and wonderful he is, to guarantee us ascension to heaven in the next life. We all know that natural life from start to finish holds no guarantees, so why would you think be you Catholic, Protestant, or a simple man with a deep abiding belief in God above think that a place in heaven is guaranteed to you. God, our father in heaven, does not guarantee us eternal life in his heavenly kingdom.  God merely offers us the promise of eternal life in his Kingdom if we manage to get there through his will and desire.

If it is all dependent on God’s will and desire, what role does the church or organized religion play? They are all well-worn pathways to realizing that promise, but it cannot be the only one otherwise far too many would be left out. If he were to select only Catholics, that would leave all the Protestants and Jews out. If were to select only those who attend some church, he would leave out all those who do not attend any kind of church. A loving forgiving father would not leave so many of his children out in the cold, so there must be other ways he can save them, to help them realize his promise. As our reading states, “the scriptures tell men that God wants everyone saved.” Whether it is a “supernatural salvation” God just grants to his non-Christian or non-believing children or he has some plan or some other way beyond man’s comprehension to save us, a pathway to realize his promise must exist for us all. As we have read, we are all afflicted with the burden of the “original sin,” so through no fault of our own we are all on the road to perdition from the moment we are born. If this is true, there must be more ways off that road. It cannot be all exclusive to one faith, like the Catholic Saints we have read have tried to convince us of for our father in heaven would not want one half or three quarters of his children to perish in the flames of hell just because they do not subscribe to the idea that a wise exalted old fellow in a funny hat is the only one that holds the keys to heaven gate.

I haven’t been to Sunday services in a church in decades, but sitting behind me on my book shelf right at this moment rests several different Bibles. Do I believe every word in the Bible? Absolutely not because literal interpretations of that wonderful book causes people do stupid appalling things in the heavenly father’s name.  God is wonderful, God is great, God loves us and forgives us for our trespasses, but not even divine intervention can fix certain kinds of stupid. Do I believe in God? You bet I do because one not believing in God is far to frightening to contemplate. Two, if any creature on earth ever needed a divine Sheppard to watch over them, it is man because no creature on earth is more hell bent on their own destruction than man. Three, only God could help us make sense of this beautiful chaos we call life. We can only pray that one day we will get the chance to stand in the light of our heavenly father and receive the answers to all the questions religious wars have been fought over, the answers that have always been just out of our minds reach, the answers that have at times both mystified our minds and tortured our mortal souls.

My Charlie Brown Christmas Tree

I remember a Christmas growing up in the mountains of upstate New York when things were hard, money was shorter than usual, and my father was not around much. As we approached Christmas that year, it looked like my mother and I were not even going to have a Christmas tree. I was only about twelve or thirteen that year, but the idea of not having a Christmas tree that year just didn’t set well with me, so without my mother knowing I got up early one morning and gathered up a hand saw and my father’s double-bladed axe. It had snowed the night before and it was very cold as it usually was up there that time of year. However, I was determined to have a Christmas tree one way or another, so I trudged through about four inches of snow into the woods behind my house with the saw in one hand and a double-bladed axe over my shoulder.  Even being bundled up good I was getting cold, so I knew I had to find a tree soon. The best tree I could find was a tall oddly thick pine tree. I could not use the whole tree because it was too tall, so I climbed half way up the tree carrying the handsaw and cut the top off. I tossed the saw down just before I cut through it all the way and pushed the tree top with my shoulder just enough to make it crack and tumble to the ground. When I got down, I tied the saw and axe on the tree with a piece of rope I had stuck in my pocket and dragged my Christmas tree through the snow to my house about a mile or so away. I was really freezing by the time I got back and my hands because I had to remove my gloves to use the saw felt like they were not far from frostbite, so I went in to get warm and to pull out the tree stand. I told my mother I got tree and she looked at it from the window and said, “I do not think that old pine tree is going to work because the needles are going to fall off quicker.” I said, “I guess will just have to make it last somehow.” After warming back up, I went back outside and shaved the trunk flat, brought it in the house, and stood it up in the tree stand. I looked at it and thought well at least my tree looks better than “Charlie Brown’s.” We decorated the pine tree with just about every decoration and light we had that year and it wound up being one of the best Christmas trees we have ever had and the aspirins we put in the tree water did make those needles stay on into the next year. We didn’t have much more than my “Charlie Brown Christmas tree,” but it still wound up being very special Christmas because we made our own Christmas that year.

When we think about Christmas we need to realize that it isn’t just about Santa Clause, presents, or even Jesus Christ, but about tradition. It is about doing those things your family has always done despite what is going on in your life, the passage of time, or the loss of loved ones and friends along the way. The traditions you follow may seem trivial, or unimportant to anyone else, but they are what makes your holiday season special to you. The little things people and families do every Christmas is where the spirit of this season comes from. I make a Christmas cookie from a recipe that has been in my family for a hundred years around every Christmas. I certainly do not need the cookies because I am diabetic, but it is one of the smells of Christmas I remember as child when my mother made them and others. I have Christmas bulbs on my tree now that have hung on my families Christmas tree since my birth and I am fifty-six years old. They say people are usually a little kinder and gentler this time of year. If you believe that they are, it is not just because it is Jesus’s birthday, but because of all of us following our traditions during this special season and doing the things our families have always done for years. The sights, sounds, smells and everything that is wonderful about this holiday are born out of the traditions of families.  Santa Clause is alive in the hearts of small children and the spirit of Christmas is alive and well in the hearts of many during this season because of things big and small that families throughout history have always done. We make this wonderful season what it is to us by the little things we do every year. It doesn’t take much to make a Christmas special or memorable. Sometimes all it takes is a “Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.”

 

Once we Were the Greatest of Friends

Once we were the greatest of friends

We enjoyed each other’s company

We could talk to each other for hours

We talked about anything and everything

Nothing was off limits or sacred between us

I used to love to make you laugh and smile

I never thought you did enough of either

You once said that we had a special connection

I thought nothing could ever come between us

I thought you would always be a part of my life

I thought we would be friends until the end

I cared for you to the very depths of my soul

I came to love you for unique reasons

Your difficult life made me crazy with worry

Your silence only served to make that worse

I would wonder if you were hurt or dead

I foolishly tried to be your everything

knowing full well that was impossible

but that did not keep me from trying

because you were always worth it to me

 

Once we were the greatest of friends

You once said you had a big heart

but there was no room in it for me

You must hate me to your very core

You knew nothing would hurt me more

than to leave me writhing in confusion

behind your unrelenting wall of silence

forever to wonder if you are dead or alive

silently praying that your life got less scary

because I will never stop caring about you

I refuse to give up on you like others have

You and others may think me a fool

but realize that I do not have it in me

to do to you what you are doing to me

I truly hope you are in a better place now

and nothing but good ever comes to you

I hope you find everything you seek in life

 

 

Maybe someday before I take my final journey

you will realize the kind of friend you had in me

Hopefully someday you will find a way to forgive me

for being crazy enough about you to foolishly believe

that I could fill all the voids and vacuums in your life

that others deliberately caused or callously left behind

Perhaps someday you will finally come to understand

that I did this because I believed you were far better

than the sum of all your mistakes and bad judgements.

When I looked at you I never saw just another woman

who had simply been ravaged by life and left broken

I saw what I believed was a “Masterpiece Undefined”

Alas maybe I am nothing more than a crazy blind dreamer

stumbling through life seeing only the very best in people

daring to believe that I can make them see what I see.

 

 

 

 

 

Why My Mother?

Dear God

Why did you have to pick her?

Why did you have to take my mom so soon?

Why did she have to go to heaven now?

It just hurts so bad not having her here.

Every time I think about everything she is going to miss

tears flow from my eyes like rain running off a tin roof.

My mother will not get to be here for my wedding.

She will never get to meet all of her grandchildren

or get to see some of them grow up even a little.

I miss her so bad and I need her now more than ever.

Why now God? Why my mother?

 

 

Dear Michelle

Despite what you may might have heard

or seen in those silly horror movies,

there is no pattern or order to death.

Who is selected and when they are selected

is purely by chance, not some grand design.

If you were suddenly dropped in the middle

of the largest most beautiful flower garden

and you were allowed to pick just one

which flower would you pick and why?

Chances are you would seek out and choose  

a captivating flower that beckoned your gaze.

A stunningly unique and wonderful flower,

with a divine strength and beauty that captures

not just the best of your world, but all it is capable of.