Once we were the greatest of friends
We enjoyed each other’s company
We could talk to each other for hours
We talked about anything and everything
Nothing was off limits or sacred between us
I used to love to make you laugh and smile
I never thought you did enough of either
You once said that we had a special connection
I thought nothing could ever come between us
I thought you would always be a part of my life
I thought we would be friends until the end
I cared for you to the very depths of my soul
I came to love you for unique reasons
Your difficult life made me crazy with worry
Your silence only served to make that worse
I would wonder if you were hurt or dead
I foolishly tried to be your everything
knowing full well that was impossible
but that did not keep me from trying
because you were always worth it to me
Once we were the greatest of friends
You once said you had a big heart
but there was no room in it for me
You must hate me to your very core
You knew nothing would hurt me more
than to leave me writhing in confusion
behind your unrelenting wall of silence
forever to wonder if you are dead or alive
silently praying that your life got less scary
because I will never stop caring about you
I refuse to give up on you like others have
You and others may think me a fool
but realize that I do not have it in me
to do to you what you are doing to me
I truly hope you are in a better place now
and nothing but good ever comes to you
I hope you find everything you seek in life
Maybe someday before I take my final journey
you will realize the kind of friend you had in me
Hopefully someday you will find a way to forgive me
for being crazy enough about you to foolishly believe
that I could fill all the voids and vacuums in your life
that others deliberately caused or callously left behind
Perhaps someday you will finally come to understand
that I did this because I believed you were far better
than the sum of all your mistakes and bad judgements.
When I looked at you I never saw just another woman
who had simply been ravaged by life and left broken
I saw what I believed was a “Masterpiece Undefined”
Alas maybe I am nothing more than a crazy blind dreamer
stumbling through life seeing only the very best in people
daring to believe that I can make them see what I see.
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